The Third Act Begins: Finding Purpose After the Children Fly the Coop

No one quite prepares you for the day the house grows quiet. The lunches stop needing packed, the schedules loosen, and the role that once defined every hour suddenly shifts. When children leave home, well-meaning advice often follows—join a gym, pick up a hobby, stay busy—but busyness doesn’t always heal the ache of letting go. In this reflective post, author Janell York explores the unique grief and surprising invitation of the empty-nest season, sharing how this life transition inspired the heart behind her novel The Day Sarah Ran Away and a deeper search for purpose in what comes next.

Finding purpose after children leave home can be difficult to navigate. Joining the gym, starting a hobby, or finding ways to stay busy doesn’t fill the void, especially if you’ve enjoyed raising your kids.

I love this quote, “A mother’s job is to teach her children not to need her anymore. The hardest part of that job is accepting success.” – Unknown

In my book, The Day Sarah Ran Away, Sarah has no clue what to do with her life now that her only daughter has left home. In one chapter, she shares her struggle with her new-found friends.

Sarah’s friends explain to her the three stages of a woman’s life. Act one – childhood. Act two – marriage and raising a family. Act three is described in the excerpt below.

“After a few moments, Delores is poised again and clarifies, “I think what Bea means to say is the third act can be spent doing the things you didn’t have the time, energy, or resources to accomplish when you were younger. You need to ask yourself: With all the wisdom and experience you now have in your arsenal, how will you use the time you have left?”

Sweat pops out on the back of my neck. Her pale-blue eyes seem to pierce my innermost thoughts. She leans in closer. “What dreams or goals have you left unfinished? Who do you want to be in this last stage of your life, Sarah?”

I give her my honest response. ‘I have no idea’.”

I’ll be honest, even though I had a full-time job, I had no idea what was next for me either. I grappled finding purpose that didn’t revolve around my girls. As a high school counselor, I witnessed many other parents struggle as well. I learned it’s a different kind of grief–––letting go of something that brought joy. Parents’ roles change from being an active participant in their children’s lives to bystanders.

As I was trying to sort out my own feelings, I started journaling. Unexpectedly, characters began to form in my imagination. The first one was the main character, Sarah, then a host of lively, loveable ladies came along. While her reaction was extreme, I thought, who hasn’t thought about running away at some point in their life. But where would she run away to?

I wanted to take Sarah to places I’ve traveled, so I pulled out my scrapbooks. Hoping to be a travel journalist one day, I had written detailed accounts of our family trips. It was fun perusing the pictures and stories in the albums. I finally settled on several settings, mirroring Sarah’s inner struggles and character development.

While the characters and circumstances are fictional, it was fun placing “Easter eggs” throughout the book, I knew my family would recognize and enjoy.

Even though the book has some heavy themes, I intertwined several humorous scenes. It was rewarding writing about women my age or older, taking adventures and enjoying wonderful comradery between them.

The more the story developed, the more I prayed for other empty nesters. I hoped empty nest readers would be comforted by the realization they’re not alone in their feelings. For my younger readers still in the throes of raising a family, Sarah’s story is a good cautionary tale.

 

Title: The Day Sarah Ran Away

Author: Janell Goodrich York

Series, The Sisterhood Pie Pact, Book 1

Genre: Contemporary Women’s Fiction

A heartfelt tale of discovery and resilience when plans fall apart.

Sarah Goodwin loved her life as a stay-at-home mom, pouring her heart into every moment with
her only daughter, Emma. But now, Emma is off at college and rarely visits or answers her calls,
leaving Sarah feeling adrift in a sea of routines—no more soccer games, fundraisers, dress
shopping, or birthday parties. As each monotonous day blends into the next, Sarah longs for
something more.

When Emma announces she’ll be home for the summer to plan her wedding, Sarah is thrilled at
the thought of shared dreams, endless to-do lists, and the promise of reconnecting. But her
perfect summer quickly unravels when unexpected events send her on a daring journey with new
companions—an adventure filled with twists, revelations, and surprises she never saw coming.
As Sarah journeys west, questions loom. What will her husband do when he discovers she’s
gone? Where will this journey lead her? And most importantly, what lies ahead for Sarah now?

Available in ebook and paperback formats. Read for free with Kindle Unlimited membership

 

Janell Goodrich York is a retired high school guidance counselor. She was born in Indiana, but raised in a small town in Southwest Missouri. Janell loves to travel, especially to beach destinations. She loves to hang out with her family and spoil her two dogs. Janell is a girl mom of three awesome adult daughters and Meme to five “perfect” grandkids. Janell lives in Missouri with her wonderful husband. Her debut novel, The Day Sarah Ran Away, was published by Scrivenings Press August 2025. You can learn more about her on her website https://janellyork.com